Somebody suggested that I "name and shame" diners who through the years have been bothersome, painful or generally rude. I don't like the idea at all, since people do not usually behave that way. The few "strays" who do, I certainly wouldn't name. I think one of the essentials of being associated with a restaurant is discretion.
However, I clearly remember the night that Mrs Sonia Gandhi, three of her cabinet ministers, members of the South African government, and a number of local dignitaries came for dinner. The security was what is known as "tight," and a number of well dressed security agents from India, as well as top South African government security guards, accompanied them. I was very specifically requested to make sure that the two exit doors in the restaurant remain open throughout the evening, and I clearly understood the need for this cautionary measure.
The same evening a seriously important and greatly respected business executive, who frequented the restaurant, had booked a small table for members of his family and himself. We usually seated them at a particular table, however that night we had large parties and couldn't give them their "usual." My head waiter at the time thought the executive's wife was "put out," and that she had had her "status" lowered.
The VIPs were served their first course, when the head waiter, perspiring profusely, entered my kitchen to inform me that "Mrs Executive" said she was cold and wanted the doors closed. The weather that day was very slightly coolish. I told him "well, put a stopper at the door, but leave it ajar and explain to her the complexity of the situation." A few minutes went by and he returned exclaiming "She won't listen, she insists, help!" I responded "well, I'm busy cooking. So please go calm her." Back he came saying "She insists, and wants to see you immediately."
I know I am an extremely good chef. I also know that I am extremely impatient, and I have never claimed the quality of being a "people's person." So don't order me to leave an extremely busy kitchen to attend to a petty annoyance, which should have been sorted out by the Head Waiter. Reluctantly I instructed a chef to attend to what I had been doing, and left the kitchen to calm the storm.
I barely got to the table when I was told by the now hysterical woman "I want the door closed. I'm cold." I tactfully told her that this was not possible as it was a security risk to a party of VVIPS, but I could offer her a pashmino, put a heater next to her, or offer her my cure to most difficult situations.....a stiff whisky! She responded "Don't be stupid, and who is more important than me!" I would have loved to say "I suppose your husband who provides for the position you now occupy".....but I didn't! Instead I suppose I looked a little dumbfounded! She continued "Well, who are these people? I insist on being told." I then addressed her husband asking him if he was having a private party, whether he would appreciate me announcing to every inquisitive guest who the party consisted of. I received no answer, and wondered if he was henpecked. I had no other recourse but to say that I was sorry. However, as I left the table she pushed her chair aside and went to bang the door close. "I'll close it myself" she shouted, as she tried to peek into the room occupied by the people thought to be more important than herself.
Obviously I reopened the door, to which she responded "We're leaving! I am not freezing for anybody's benefit." Her husband and family dutifully followed, however not before her newly married son stopped to tell me I was a "ridiculous old fool." He is a lovely human being, and I wouldn't want to "name and shame" her. I don't like the idea and he would'nt deserve it.
Freda
Over the past twenty odd years I have had many men and women come to Le Canard. Some remain indelibly set in my mind. I think the most impressive of all are those who retain their graciousness over and above their sense of importance. Certainly Her Royal Highness Princess Benedikte Ingrid of Denmark was a shining example of gentility and charm.
Another very charming, carefree and delightful woman who visited Le Canard, was Academy Award winning actress Marlee Matlin. She handled her hearing disability with cheer and smiles. She was so taken with the tablecloth on her table, which had been embroidered with ducks, that I had the plates removed, folded the cloth stains and all, and handed it to her as a gift. She couldn't have been more pleased when she was handed her Oscar.
